9 hours translated: "The Rest of Your Life"

"Due to last nights late arrival, flight 6067 to Frankfurt, Germany has been delayed until 6:oo pm."

I didn't board the plane until 7:30 that night. By the time I did settle in my seat, the pilot's voice pops up over the intercom and he announces that the plane's hydraulics were leaking last night and just in case they begin to leak again, the plane needs to be within 1 hour of an airport at all times, to land. Meaning that rather than flying directly over the Atlantic to Frankfurt, the plane will fly so that it could hug various countries in case of a mechanical malfunction.

What does this mean for me?
1. A nine hour flight turns into approximately eternity and twenty three minutes.
2. Further hydraulic malfunctions resulting in:
a.) An attempt to land somewhere that is NOT Frankfurt.
b.) The plane plunges into the Atlantic and Ruby and my Mom quickly learn to swim.

::: Nine hours later...::::

Kim: "Whoa, I slept through that entire flight. Nice!"
Dad: "We're still over the Atlantic... We're not in Frankfurt. Why are we landing?"
Pilot: "Welcome to Iceland!"
Passengers: " - insert expletives here - "

Explanation:
The pilot said we landed so that they could turnover the plane (a.k.a house clean). He expected us to believe that he decided to land a plane full of 120 people, mid flight, because he forgot to remind Flight Attendant Olga that they were due for a health inspection and the five year old plane's five year old blankets needed to be washed for the first time.
Hah! They may have fooled the other passengers but I was not so naive! I knew the smell of the rancid German in seat 9 E would escape the cabin and leak into the pilot pit. The turnover was a ploy- the pilot only wanted to give his nostrils a break. Nevermind the leaking hydraulics.

Iceland Commentary:
-In the cafeteria I quickly opted for a ham bagel sandwich and discovered that, other than the Japanese and Fancy Americans, Icelanders are the only people who prefer their fish raw.
-Gift shop had sweet tee shirts that said "Lost in Iceland"... but they were an unreasonable price and I valued my right arm too much to give it up.

::: 4 hours later :::

Finally! Back on the plane and ready to roll! The plane starts creeping away from the gate and then stops.

Pilot: "We need to return to the gate. We left two passengers."

I began to understand the "Lost in Iceland" slogan.

::: 3 hours later :::

It's midnight and we are finally in Frankfurt. However! In consequence to the numerous delays, everyone with connecting flights missed them and Condor Airlines ended up arranging all 60 of us new flights, as well as paying for rooms at the swanky Sheraton across the street.

::: 2 hours later :::

Our eyes were blood shot and our nerves were fried, I knew the mix of asian, dog, sarcasm, and grumpiness would be unsavory so I took a bullet for team Mauser and stayed in my own room. The fact that I kind of wanted to sleep in one of the plush rooms with the big beds without the parents and dog may have been a slight factor in my decision but honestly, the decision was for the good of the people. Right?
Okay, maybe not. But whatever. I was stinkin' tired and I couldn't resist. I deserved it. Don't judge me.

::: 5 hours later ::: Monday, September 1st, 6:00 am Frankfurt, Germany

I wake up and get some breakfast at the lobby. Croissant, an apple, and peppermint tea. Mmm.. My parents were fifteen minutes late for meeting me (that's right, I wasn't the late one) but I was okay with that. The general mood I would say was: refreshed. The night of sleep and delicious food prior to the sleep made up for the hard times with Condor. So the Mausers waed to the airport, boarded the plane without hassle at 8:00 (only a fifteen delay to turn over the plane), and we were off to Amsterdam. Or as my mom sometimes slips and says "Hamsterdam!"

::: about thirty minutes into the flight :::

My head begins to hurt and my stomach starts to turn. I can feel the color in my face drain out as nausea settles in. I don't know what happened! One second, I was fine and now I was fearing for the people next to me. I thought of what happened at the State Fair to my friend Mike. We all went on a ride called the Apollo and afterwards, he was as white as a ghost and as sick as a dog. I remember him telling me that on our way to the bathroom he became overwhelmed with the uge to purge and had to sit down. He had to mentally force himself to not puke but once that feeling passed, he felt like a million bucks. So I tried that. It didn't work. I just wanted to run to the bathroom. HOWEVER! The buckle your seat belt sign popped on and we were beginning to land. So I hung my head between my knees and thought about what I would do once we landed. Oddly enough, that position was really relaxing for me and it got me through. I got off the plane and went straight for the toilettes. Nothing happened. But I still felt nauseous.

::: 11:00 am Amsterdam, The Netherlands ::::

It was as if we didn't even go through customs. The man asked my dad why we were there and he let us pass. He didn't even look at my passport! I was incredibly relieved. We walked outside with all 700 million pounds of luggage and there we were. In Holland. The air was surprisingly clean and I instantly felt better. Looking around, there were people of all sorts and it reminded me of New York. We hopped on a Taxi and we made our way to our place of residence.

Next up! Adventures in Den Haag, Netherlands!!! Stay tuned!


Amsterdam Arrival: